SAD

I feel like I am going crazy. I hope writing about this will put and end to this bullshit. My grandfather is dying. He is 92 and has had the best old age of anyone I have met as of yet. But I still cant stop crying every time I think of him lying in a bed dying. My poor Dad has called him everyday for the past 30 years or so since he moved to Miami. He left on his 60th birthday to go to New York to visit his father on his death/hospice bed. God - I'm fucking bawling here. This is bullshit. I have to get some composure for the funeral. I didn't even know him that well. Saw him about once every other year at best. In the past 2 years I have seen him 3 times though. I guess I am crying b/c I feel guilty for being such a shitty granddaughter. That must be it - just started crying harder. This whole writing thing just isn't working for me today.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

Vacation, Vacation, Vacation!!!

A few days after my b-day, Fi and I went on a tiny (in duration and size) cruise to Grand Bahama. If I don’t see another buffet for the next….week, I will be a very happy girl, as opposed to a very full, bloated, and lethargic girl.



We rented a scooter from a guy named “Doobie” who, when asked what the coolest local part of town was, answered “the ghetto, maan”. I don’t know if he was full of shit or what but I definitely got the impression that the natives resent the tourists and I can't say I blame them as I also live in a tourist destination and mock them every chance I get.



I first visited the island back around 1988 and OH MY GOD HAS IT CHANGED. One good thing about the island is the deliciously warm and simultaneously crystal clear waters. We found a beach without a single person and I got to topless for a while.



**Side note: it’s a great feeling – if you haven’t tried it you really should.**



While we were in the water we could see a HUGE thunderstorm brewing on the other side of the island. It might have had something to do w/ the alternating extremely warm and slightly chilly currents flowing past us. I’ve been to beaches hundreds of times and have never experienced such distinct currents before.



I love getting away from the main crowd – the last thing Fi and I wanted to do was spend our day off the ship with the rest of our “mates” on a crowded island. That one of the major reasons we work. We both think the same ways in the times that count – free times.



We did go the ghetto for lunch and were not at all disappointed. I had the best cracked conch ever, and he had a great lentil and dumping soup. I believe we also drank more on this vacation than we have in the past year combined (we prefer the Mary Jane).



Our cabin was very cool also. We upgraded to one at the very front of the ship and you could tell by the shape of the room – really dark wood walls, ceiling, and basically everything else except for a few pink wall. We had this huge wooden support beam (shaped like a decorative I-beam) in the center of the cabin and a King size bed in a separate room. For us, this is way swanky. The Ship’s TV had “ship view” which was basically our view. It took us an embarrassingly long time to figure that out.



My favorite part of the trip was the last night. We went to the front of the ship which also happened to be the darkest part of it and watched the most amazing lightning storm brewing over Miami. There were stretches that had 8 full seconds of lighting. We couldn’t see any arcs, only the clouds lighting up in a spectacular display by my god – Mother Nature.



Standing at the front of the ship (almost Titanic style) with all that wind and nature showing us her best was mesmerizing and the pinnacle of a pretty cool and much needed escape.




"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

To: Paul

Well, they say it's your birthday, well it's my birthday too!

And Isabella Rossellini.

Happy Birthday to us all!!

And today I step, or most likely fall, into the 3rd decade of my life.


"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

Gave in to Curiosity

I thought I didn't care, but damn I'm curious. Do I have any lurkers? Now I will know. I finally installed a site meter. I think no one except for one person reads this, but now I will know. I hope it doesn't have a censoring effect. I really like being uncensored. I am a good girl w/ a devious side. One would never know by looking at me - oops except for that rather noticeable tattoo on my ankle. A part of me from when I was 100% funkadelic. Before real life began I had purple hair. Bright. Long. Despite this, people still saw through the weirdness and saw the good in me. I like those kind of people. I HATE the people who treat me differently after they find out what kind of car I drive, or that I am the bosses daughter. But I feel as if I got their card. I saw the true them, before they put on the mask of cordiality. I truly believe that how you treat "underlings" is the TRUE reflection of you.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

Saturday Night at Work Being Naughty

I am at work late on a Saturday. I needed a break. What can I do now, that I cant do when there are others around?


Ahhhh.....I just had the most wonderful orgasm.

Thank you nature for giving women this gift of a whole body shuddering arriving in waves, moment of extreme pleasure.

Thank you again.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

I am going on a cruise dammit

I wrote a lot about this.

How I never plan things.

How when I do, horrible things happen.

I was supposed to go to Europe 9/11. You know what happend.

I was supposed to go to DC, Richmond, and a cute B&B in the Blue Ridge Mtns. My future mother in-law died just a few days after the trip was supposed to start.

Conclusion - I have planned a fun vacation - Everyone better watch their backs.

This is the Cliff Notes version of what I had originally written.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

Computer - You SUCK

I just wrote a shitload and when i hit post, my server went down. Great.


"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."