Tuesday, August 31, 2004

posting can become addictive

Nothing for who know how long, then a plea for funnies and then 2 posts in one day plus 1 brutally honest one that I don't know what the hell I am going to w/. I am not as brave as Dooce.

I used to love reading blogs. I don't get the same enjoyment anymore. I wonder why.

I also find myself leaving really long comments on other peoples blogs that really should be reserved for my blog. I feel as if I am using someone else's soapbox for my purposes. Anyone get annoyed by my long comments? If they go beyond two paragraphs I have been deleting them lately.

Wanted to go to Bozeman, MT for the long weekend, but a hurricane is bearing down on Florida. If it hits Miami, there will tons of canned good floating around the Grove courtesy of me - a Costco junkie. It really sucks if your neighborhood Costco junkie lives in an evacuation zone. All the good food ends up under water. But not the cans. The glorious cans can be found w/ my new snorkeling gear. Now, just in case, because the damn storm isn't supposed to reach land till FRIDAY, but people are still freaked about it, I need to go get me some bottled H20 and I guess stock up on some Mary Jane.

For THREE whole years, I thought I had no windstorm insurance, or for that matter insurance of any kind, but after asking my wonderful father, I found out that he arranged it for me. I love the man. He is as disorganized as I am, but solid as a rock under stress. I got his messiness and packratness, and my moms (for lack of a much better work b/c the anti-anxiety, brain numbing pills have kicked in) hysteria. For the past 2 days I have felt as if I have been having a nervous breakdown at the young and tender age of 30. And my doctor is out of town. Lovely. I call crying, saying I NEED to see him TODAY and they say "Sorry, he wont be in the office till the end of September. Call back then" FUCK YOU, YOU STUPID PEOPLE - DON'T YOU REALIZE I AM HAVING SOME SERIOUS MENTAL ISSUES AT THE MOMENT??

Sadly, my usual long weekend plans have most likely been washed away w/ hurricane Charlie. I love the west coast. Hope it didn't kill North Captiva Island and that other island I was at too much.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."


Got 11 invites. Anybody want em?

Just drop me a line.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

pathetic plea for punny

In lieu of having anything interesting, positive, intelligible, uplifting, insightful, or downright not fucking depressing to say (for a long time it seems) - I am asking, please, make me laugh. Or at least smile.

My transparent patheticness just made me smile :-)

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

Tuesday, August 17, 2004

The Man to whom I will say "I Do"


“The Dirty Lymeric”
I miss you more and more
In fact I'm rather sore
I went up and down
All over town
Until I got caught in a store

“The Dirty Haiku”
You are far away
I can not jack off that far
Boy, did I try hard

“The Good One”
I wish you were here by my side
And on every open valley I visit on bicycle
In every charming old rock house I visit on foot
With every little road or beaten path I drive down
Sitting at the dinner table when I fill my hunger
And again when I rise and I am still hungry
Hungry for you
Hungry for your love
Hungry for our love
I wish you were here by my side.

Written while in France, visiting and saying good-by to his Mamman again.

Yes - I love my baby's poetry. So sweet, so silly and soo dirty. Like us.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

Saturday, August 14, 2004

What Kind of Condo Pool Closes at 7?

So its saturday night, I cleaned all day (yah!) and finally got in the mood to be social and he didnt answer the phone. He is my parents godson someone I consider to be a cousin. F is out of town for the week so I feel like I should be interacting w/ people. I hate this stupid "social anxiety." I feel like people think I dont like them, when in reality I am just plain scared - like a little sissy. OK - I am being harsh but I need to slap some sense into myself. I have a good life. I am loved by many. Hell, I even the fortunate advantage of being good looking and beliving it more often that not. Please dont think I am vain - just what people tell me and I sometimes see in the mirror. If I ever manage to get pictures up here ya'll think I am lying b/c I cant take a good picture for the life of me. Ironically enough, my passport picture is my favorite one and I have to renew it I think this year. I was wondering where I was before I went off on this tangent and realized I was in the midst of really poo-poo depressing shit.

Phone is ringing!

He will be here in 1/2 an hour and comment on my cleaning efforts. I might not have mentioned this before, but I am ashamed to admit that I am a well, lets face it, a slob to an abnormal degree. I do believe that if I get my living condition in order, the rest will follow. A clean home should lead to a clean mind right? I dont mind cleaning, I actually kinda like it - I just really suck at putting things away and organizing. I doesnt hurt that both F and I are on the packrat side. Sooo tempting to throw away some of his really old stuff that has been in boxes since he moved in, but I know certain things are special to me and I might toss something really special to him....

I am in a mellow mood so tonight we are going to my parents condo on the beach (a designer, if a bit to pristine, paradise high up in the sky away from the real world) to watch a movie, smoke some good pot, and take a jump in the ocean/and or hot tub. The fucking pool closes at 7pm. Can you believe that bullshit?

I believe if I were to reread this (which I wont), I would think myself a bit on the manic side - but maybe not.

I really cant believe that the pool closes at 7.

I lied - just reread, but didnt change anything, except for grammatical shit. Dont think I sound too manic. Think I was honest yet didnt crucify myself -perhaps in a plea for "oh, its OK, youre normal". I am trying to get to point where I tell my friends about this and not be ahsamed for what I write while keeping it as honest a possible. I dont see it happening, but ya never know.

I promise - next post will be about a vaction that started very bad, but endend very good.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

New Receptionist

We just hired one. She "J" is anorexic and a younger girl who works here on her summer break from high school wants to look like her. That makes me sad. M (younger girl) is beautiful. She isn't tiny but she has curves in all the right places. But she also wants to be an actress so is looking to look like Laura Flynn Boyle. Though beautiful in her own right, she will never have that figure, and she should thank her lucky stars for that. J is so skinny that her head looks about 2-3 sizes too big for her body. She had no lunch today. Makes me wonder if she eats.... Can't wait for this to progress. I feel bad for her but don't know what to say. I guess its too early to be butting my nose into someone else's business but I would hate to think that she thinks she looks fat. She looks like she is going to topple over from too much head weight!

Random Racist Thought: I don't trust unnaturally skinny people; its like they are hiding something. It also feels like they all think I am obese.

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

Are you there God?

In 1998, Josh Hempel, then 16, in Calgary, Alberta, became the then-latest person to be hit by lightning shortly after ending an argument by inviting God to strike him with lightning if he was wrong. (The subject of this argument was whether God exists.) He was hospitalized but recovered.

Hmmm, I've done that several times. Maybe I will stop now....

"Saving one animal won't change the world, but it will change the world for that one animal."